Slackstress Vlog: Sticks are the New Pet Rocks

Sticks rock. Stones, well, they ARE rocks already, so they don't do jack. I suppose they roll, but I digress in a really cheesy, lame brain kind of way. Deal.

Yep, I'm officially an old-fashioned mom-tool because I think plain old sticks are hotter toys than Nintendo's enormously popular Wii Play.

And nature provides a shapely, frighteningly jagged array of sticks, twigs and branches for no-attention-span, bored for no friggin' reason children at no - zip, zilch, zero - cost to their no-patience, strapped for time and play time creativity soul-sucked parents.

Today I lost my wallet (again - oh airhead snap!), so Slackstress me and the blondie kids three were up the creek with no dough for entrance to a stuffy local art museum (that might have bored them to tears anyway).

Here, out in the breezy, sunny, salty Southern California air, I learn that the value of simply throwing my wound up spawn trio a stick like little wild doggies is completely underrated.

I say, stick it to yourself when the sun IS shining. Stick with simplicity. Stick with sticks when the terrain gets sticky. Sorry for the cliche train but you're already stuck. That was bad, I know.

Any-whoo, I think you'll agree that fun is always funner (more fun?) when it's FREE (and distracts your hyper three-kid army from blitzkrieg-ing one another into oblivion for more than five whole minutes -- long enough to inhale a Venti latte without aspirating your lungs or burning your kid boo-boo all-better smooching freshly stop sign red lipstick painted lips)!!!

You can't beat the Pacific Ocean view in this quickie vlog either.

Stones are sure to top the Slackstress "it" toy list next when my brood soon outgrows stabbing each other in their beady eyes with randomly strewn by gale force wind sticks.

Stones ... hmmm ... simple ... free and DANGEROUS, even a desperate weapon of choice in, gee, well, some perpetually war-torn parts of the world.

I think I'll stick to sticks after all.