(Hard Advice) Hike to the Hollywood Sign

Here I escape my three-kid circus for a brisk hike to the famous Hollywood sign, but find myself in hot water with my hike-mate cousin, who started what was supposed to be a relaxing Mt. Hollywood trek off on shaky footing by giving me some sudden, unexpected parenting advice.

For the record, said cousin has NO children. Not a one! And he’s fully aware I’m blogging about this. He even taped this video, where I jokingly threaten to throw him over the fence and onto the Hollywood Sign following his critique.

It was grueling for me to hear his fault-finding but accurate observations, the sum of what I already know to be true (and deeply loathe in my parent self) -- I yell and scream at my kids all day long with few results and often fail to follow through with heaps of threatened discipline.


Basically, I suck. Am I a bad mother?

At least that's how I felt during the first part of our “talk” (unplanned intervention?).

How do you rise above your fired up mother emotions and not take such intimate criticism personally?

The way in which you parent your children -- Is there a subject that is closer to the heart?

How well do you receive criticism re: your (flawed or not) parenting style, constructive or not?

Does it matter to you if the person critiquing your parenting style has children or not? Haven’t you heard: “It’s always the ones who have none who know the most.” Hells yeah.

In all, I know my cousin’s intentions were pure. Nothing less. He cares for my children. He loves my family. In the end, I understand where he was going and why, even if it was hell to hear. Change is hard but we our family really could use some, right away. If my cousin’s hard talk was a catalyst for that change, then I’m glad we “went there.”

But the whole thing still felt a bit like I was an alcoholic and this was my official intervention. No hard feelings, though, cousin. I’m not mad. More like sad.

Are you able to see past your personal, emotional reactions to outsiders’ parenting advice, evaluate their advice and eventually apply your new, hopefully helpful but hard-to-hear knowledge?

How have you reacted to having your shameful, embarrassing parenting realities/bad habits exposed like a raw nerve and then pushed up close to your nose for you to see in plain view?

*Please don't watch this with the kids because I swear like a trucker in it. Not one of my best vids, but hey, it's a holiday Monday and I'm moving like a snail.