Is Carseat Safety Optional/Cultural (or am I just anal)?

Today, for the third shocking time in the past week, I knocked horns with a fellow mother over the issue of car seat safety.

Is it me, or is it out of style to strap your most precious cargo securely into a booster seat or five-point harness, whatever is age/weight appropriate, these days?

My husband says safety and how far we mothers take our concerns about our children's health and well being is largely a cultural issue. Personally, he feels Americans take safety way too far, especially when it comes to riding in the car.

A few years back I refused to allow my then 8-month-old (the Maestro of Mouth, who is now brimming on age 6) to ride in a London cab from Trafalgar Square. My parents-in-law, who always suffer my difficult, demanding nature with their good natured attitude, seemed a little surprised, perhaps even wondering what the big deal was.

For the record, two issues I'm definitely NEVER, EVER going to bend on is carseat safety and helmets when riding Razor scooters and fast-clipping bikes. I admit, I did let my 2-year-old daughter sit on her new pink and purple tassled Radio Flyer trike yesterday sans skull cover, but she wasn't even budging. She couldn't pedal the thing yet if her life depended on it.

The last place I'd ever want my children is ricocheting around the backseat of an SUV in is the 405 Freeway, or any dangerous, often deadly, Southern California freeway, where people, even sometimes very little people, collide and die almost daily. I know. I used to write news in an L.A. newsroom.

One of my closest friends used to live in Egypt, where she said children seldom ever use car seats. Hell, the don't even have any road rules there. You could even ride around without doors fastened to your vehicle. I don't even think I could visit there until my children reach non-car seat age, despite its historical significance and magnificence.

However, right here, in the United States, where it is the LAW, allow me to remind you, people, to strap your children safely into the proper car seat whenever the vehicle is in motion, I WILL NOT budge. Not even on my street, crawling along at 20 miles per hour. Anal, yes. But extremely caring.

Yes, you may take my child out for a great play date, if I have given you permission. That in and of itself involves a great leap of trust, as my sister-in-law recently pointed out. No, you may not allow him (or her) to bounce like a bed bud in the back seat at will.

I hope I haven't offended my friends, however strong my feelings are on this issue. But I wouldn't want to find out how broken my heart would be if any of my three children feebly emerged from the Jaws of Life wounded, or even dead, because of someone else's lax attitude toward their safety.

Why should I have to feel slightly embarrassed about being uptight about the protection and security of my most valuable kindred spirits? Somehow I do. Still, I won't back down.

Weigh in fellow moms. Let me know what you think. Am I just being anal? I think not. I welcome all opinions, even ones from the opposite court. Do share.

What about you? If your child is heading off somewhere in the care of your fellow, supposedly responsible and trusted mother friend, do you know for sure at this very moment if he/she is strapped down with care?